Nessalyn Van Loch's Student Guide

This is the first diary of Nessa Van Loch, Daughter of the Loch Ness Monster.

16~7
I have decided to tell people about my opinion on foreign monsters and their problems with others, to present at the opening argh-sembly on the first day back of school. As a Scottish monster me-self, my dialect can be a bit of a social palaver, though my friends are used to it. Scottish monsters aren’t the only ones…I guess you could call it a misunderstanding more than you could call it Monsterist values. Come on, not being able to understand a thing is a point, but a wee bit of learning never hurt anyone, didn’t it? Well, it’s a school after all.

18~7
Me and my girl Clarissa decided to get some lunch at Nathan’s Fearmous Hot Dogs in the Maul. That place always has the beast hot-dogs around, and a good auld chilli cheese does me well good any day of the week. Clarissa’s telling me about how her and Impert are so ‘tight around her finger’, but despite my mask of elation, I feel sorry for Impert. Poor bairn hasn’t had an independent moment since…well, goth knows when.

22~7
I ne’er really do this, but I think that I was ready. Yes - I was going to put my speech on the school blog. I’m getting Spectra to sneak it on in my name, which I really shouldn’t let her do, but it’s the only real way I can state my braw opinion to the world. If I were totally honest I am actually pleased that I have plucked up the courage to let everyone know about what I really think, and I’m expecting some positive feedback in a way.

25~7
Three days on and I decided to check how my speech was going on the school blog. Yer wouldn’t believe how many positive comments I got! Jawss Stone (a gargoyle) was motivated and said “This makes me proud to be stone.” and Curseden Stewart, by gum she was happy - “’No matter what monster you are or where your from, everyone is equal.’ That statement is the nail you hit on the head, and I couldn’t be any happier J”. Perhaps I should do a follow-up, but I think that I have said enough for now.

1~8
I saw a story in t’local newspaper The Executioner today. One big look at the headline - ‘JAWS in real life’ - and I was in the process of a mega-boak (vomit). The sea is always a bit of a weak point for me…whereas one day I wish to return to Loch Ness so that I can settle down a bit, though Monster High is my opportunity to learn, as I’m not the beast learning-wise. One sentence - I told them so.

10~8
Clarissa gave me a huge present today. I have no idea why, so I just opened it…the excitement…thrill of opening the wrapper to see…a woolly jumper? That’s what we call sweaters back in Scotland. It was striped green and blue, with white stripes among them, though it felt scratchy; I acted as if I was totally fine with it, and she went away. Why the Nessie did Clarissa get me a woolly jumper?

16~8
Today I started my Phantom Physics project - studying all of the elements of the Periodic Table, by writing a song about it and having Lina Greene sing it for me - face it, if I’m not back-up, I sound a bit like a horse when I sing, ya know what I mean? Okay, maybe yer don’t, but you could say that Lina’s pretty good for the role of singer. Here’s the opening lines: “Betcha didn’t know how the elements go, But here’s a quick song just so that you know, Hydrogen’s the starting element then, Helium, Lithium, Beryllium next, Boron and then Carbon too, Nitrogen and Oxygen, yes it’s true, Fluorine is nine, then Neon and now, You know the first ten, and I shown you how.” What’cha think about that, then?

24~8
Impert came up to me, running for help. At first I thought it was a true emergency, but no…just Clarissa’s getting on his nerves. He said that she wouldn’t stop giving him piggybacks and feeding him cupcakes via choo choo train, and of course, the silly nickname habits that just wouldn’t stop. Now I know our Clarissa, I do, so I told him that it’s all just her affection for him, and that I’ll tell her to tone down a bit. I hope that Impert’s okay, because as I said, I feel sorry for the bairn.

1~9
My turtle Professor Scot is reciting the alphabet. Again. Sometimes I feel like he’s always working on the same things, though I can understand that turtles are a wee bit slower than us Loch Ness Monsters. My Scot has learned the alphabet, numbers and even the Periodic Table - oh, and speaking of Periodic Tables, me and Lina are working hard on the song - I’ve finished the lyrics, and Lina’s gonna sort out a rhythm with a few demos for me. Six days until I bring the finished product to Professor Deutch.

5~9
There’s two days until I return to classes, and I hope that Professor Deutch is well impressed with my Phantom Physics project. I finished the song and Lina’s recorded it on a Disk to give to me in class - I got my schedule early today, and Lina’s in my class according to the lists I got. I can’t wait to get back though I will miss vacation.